When all else fails, go with the bullet format

• I have been in a bit of a blogging funk lately.  I have stuff to blog about, but just no time to put real words down on the page.  The only time I have "free time" would be after all 3 kids go to bed and I am either so tired from the day or have a laundry list of things that need to be done that blogging is very far from my mind.  It makes me kind of sad.
• I am watching The Biggest Loser right now.  I love Jillian and Bob.  I wish I could hire Jillian to kick my ass into the best shape I could ever want.  I wish I could stare at Bob's abs all. day. long. IJS.
• All around my house is the evidence that 3 young children live here.  Chair marks on the walls, handprints on the walls, nose prints on the windows, crayon marks on the window sills, toys scattered around, shoes littering the floor, a trail of clothes and backpacks and lunchboxes and school papers.  Yep, my house looks "loved".
• I need a pedicure very badly.....and another eyebrow wax.
• Spring Break is next week.  We have absolute NO plans for Spring Break.  This kind of scares me and I do think I need to carve some time out to schedule a few things for us to do so that we don't go stir-crazy.
• Little Anthony toddler terror climbs everything now- tables, chairs, couches, ladders, stairs.  He is a force to be reckoned with.
• Sam my once laidback 3 yr old has turned into a dinosaur-growling-likestotalkbacktome-frustuated superhero turned 4 yr old is well into making dinner time a battlefield of "I won't eat that" over everything.  This coming from the kid that eats just about everything, or did until a few months ago.  At one point this week, I had thought of dedicating an entire post to this subject but as you can see, it is here instead, in just a mere bullet.  So internet peeps, can anyone enlighten me as to WHY my "eats everything kid" is now refusing and fighting me every step of the way and only at dinner?  And what the hell can I do to make him stop and return to his old ways?!!!!!  Any advice is greatly appreciated.
• Sophie begged me tonight to change her name to Brittany.  When asked why "Brittany" and where she heard the name "Brittany", she squealed ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS and it all  became clear to me.
• I ran 5+ miles on Saturday.  I ran 3.75 miles today.  I have a date with the bike at the gym tomorrow, another 3.5-4 miles on Thursday and a 6 mile run on Saturday.  I am a running fool.  Running and the act of getting ready to exercise and getting the kids ready to go to the gym and so forth......It takes up a lot of time. 
• I am finally reading a book, yes a book not a blog.  The Host by Stephanie Meyer.  I actually had low expectations for this book, but have found that I am very much enjoying it.  I am about halfway through.  Now that I am reading again, I welcome any and all book recommendations.
• I briefly watched The Oscars the other night and quickly realized that I have not watched ANY of the Best Picture nominees, nor harldy any movies in a very long time.  IF we rent a movie, I tend to fall asleep during it.  It is a weakness I have- lie down on the couch, fall asleep quickly.
• Speaking of which, it's time for me to hit the sack!  Morning comes too quickly in our house.

Thank god he's cute

The toddler is giving me a run for my money.

Every day, he adds something to his bag of tricks.

Do you see what is wrong with this picture?

You might not be able to see it, but he is holding a plastic spoon in his left hand and BANGING it on the light fixture.

He looks pretty proud of himself, doesn't he?  This picture, of his baby beer belly, makes me want to reach right into the computer screen and squeeze his belly.  I love how the waistband of his pants sits UNDER his belly.  His little baby booty jutting out.  The stance, the posture, the look on his face.....no matter how frustuating it can be to clean up the messes, to have to be constantly near him to make sure he doesn't hurt himself, this picture, this picture grabs my heart and speaks to my soul.

Damn, I love this little boy of mine. 

You might want to move on from this post

I am trying so hard NOT to write a post about how tired I am. How sore my muscles are from running. How crazy my toddler is driving me. How spending 24-7 with one, two, or three kids is not good for this mama. That I need a break. That the only breaks I seem to manage are when I am exercising or sitting in the dentist/gyn/family dr/dermatologist office. That all I can think about are life changes that are happening once again in our family.

Unpredictability, uncertainty, unsettled-ness.

I even thought: hey, let's do a post on the top 3 places I would like to travel to, BUT as I sifted through online pictures of those places, I just got sad because the likelihood of me taking a vacation anytime soon is nil to nada.

I don't want to be "woe is me" all the time and I know others probably get tired of my pity party. Hell, I get tired of my pity party.

A constant theme running through my head lately is "something has got to give" or "simplifying is the answer" or "you cannot squeeze 25 hours into a 24 hour day" or "you need to cut back on the things you do outside of the family".

When I think of cutting back, I can't decide what to cut back on.

Too much stuff. Too little of me. Unfortunately, that means that all this "stuff" only gets a little piece of me and none of that "stuff" gets the best of me.

I am torn and indecisive and tired.

And I want to go on vacation so bad that it literally hurts me physically.

OKthat'senoughseeyoulatergoodbye.

The Dash

Lately, I have been giving serious thought to how I live my life.  I am moving at a frantic pace, my plate overloaded a lot of times, my nerves frazzled.  I have done some things- intentionally and unintentionally- that have hurt others, that I am not proud of.  Words I wish I could back, deeds I wish I could undo.

Today, in church, our priest shared this poem.  It's one I've heard before but not in quite some time. 

It totally hit home and I felt like he was speaking directly to me.

The Dash Poem, by Linda Ellis

I read of a man who stood to speak
At the funeral of a friend
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
From the beginning to the end

He noted that first came the date of her birth
And spoke the following date with tears,
But he said what mattered most of all
Was the dash between those years

For that dash represents all the time
That she spent alive on earth.
And now only those who loved her
Know what that little line is worth.

For it matters not how much we own;
The cars, the house, the cash,
What matters is how we live and love
And how we spend our dash.

So think about this long and hard.
Are there things you’d like to change?
For you never know how much time is left,
That can still be rearranged.

If we could just slow down enough
To consider what’s true and real
And always try to understand
The way other people feel.

And be less quick to anger,
And show appreciation more
And love the people in our lives
Like we’ve never loved before.

If we treat each other with respect,
And more often wear a smile
Remembering that this special dash
Might only last a little while.

So, when your eulogy is being read
With your life’s actions to rehash
Would you be proud of the things they say
About how you spent your dash?

So tell me, how are YOU living your dash?

He is FOUR today and I am a sobbing mess

Bear with me, for some strange reason, I am emotional about my middle child turning four.

My beautiful, wonderful, charming, funny, sweet, energetic, athletic, scooter lovin', little brown-haired, brown-eyed mini me is FOUR. YEARS. OLD. TODAY.

Happy Birthday Sam.

You are my light, my love, my soul- from the time I first laid eyes on you.

a few weeks old

One Year Old

Two years old

Three years old

Four years old

and just taken a few days ago

You touch my heart with your "I love you back to hea-ben and back mommy" and your "I love you THIS much" while stretching your arms out as far as you can reach.

You touch my heart when you recite your ABC's and your 123's.  You try so hard to get me to understand your words- you are so patient with me.

You touch my heart when your hand grasps my hand as we walk along, or your sister's hand for that matter.

You touch my heart when you giggle and laugh and squeal with delight. 

You touch my heart when you are silly and funny and do things specifically to make me and your daddy laugh.

You touch my heart when you talk about superheroes and Buzz Lightyear and Spiderman.

You touch my heart when I watch you play and interact and hug and kiss your brother and sister.

You touch my heart when you talk about how much you miss your daddy (when he is out of town for work).

You touch my heart when your 100% boy-ness.

You, little boy, just plain ole touch my heart.  Every single day. 

Happy Birthday.  Love, Mommy

Good weekend

The time is:

And Sam, my almost 4 year old, is doing this:

Think he had a good weekend? 

My triathlon experience

If you were following me on twitter yesterday, then you kow that I completed a mini triathlon yesterday (Thursday). 

500m swim
12 mile bike
3.1 mile run

If you would like to read more about my experience, then visit me over here!