It takes a village

Did she hear it in my voice the other day when I called her and said I can't go home....and what I didn't say be alone with my thoughts....before I could finish talking, before my voice broke and the tears started flowing, she said come over right now for as long as you like.  And I did.  Thank you Kim, for rescuing me from myself.

It takes a village.

The past week's stresses have made me consider pulling myself from the Zooma Half Marathon, of which I am an Ambassador for.  I didn't know if I had it in me to complete the training, to do the training runs, to support and motivate others, to race on race day. 

However, during today's 4.2 mile run, when I finally let the emotion of this week's STUFF surface, when I finally admitted to myself that I am grieving and mourning and that I am scared and nervous and anxious and overwhelmed and stressed out to the max, the tears sobs hit me like a ton of bricks and for about three ten minutes I sobbed HARD and just let the emotion come and I let myself FEEL and that's when I knew that I had to keep running, that I had to do Zooma, that running allows me to process feelings and thoughts and LIFE when I can't seem to process it anywhere else.

Running is my saving grace.

My friends have heard the "transactional" details of all that is occurring at a break-neck speed but they haven't heard the emotion behind all of it.  I'm afraid if I start talking about the feelings with my friends that I will become a sobbing mess (see above) and then I will make them cry which will make me cry harder and then it will suck for everyone.

My dad called yesterday.  At the time he called, he only knew a little of what is going on, and before I could even ask for his and my mom's help, he offered it.  He offered them to come to Austin on their free weekends and for Spring Break.  I talked to my mom later in the day and she said "we don't know what you need us to do, but we want to support you, so yes, we will come this weekend and do whatever you need us to do".  I admitted that there is so much to do that I don't even know where to start.  She said they would help us get started on that long LIST of things that need to be done....and of course, love and play and take care of the kids for us so that Anthony and I can do whatever we need to do.

It takes a village.

I shared with some of my bloggy friends the craziness and they came through with flying colors of support and love.

It takes a village.

Luckily, I have a pretty strong village surrounding me.